An Unfriendly Swap: Formal Hall Gone Awry at Downing College

31 October, 2009

On the eve of All Hallow’s Eve, Peterhouse’s MCR went to Downing College’s Formal Hall. Though it was Halloween themed, NO ONE from Downing was wearing their academic gown. This is an amusing observation from my perspective as a Petrean: if not other Petreans, then the Porter, would chide a Petrean who dares show up to Formal Hall without his/her gowns.

This aside, the hall at Downing was very pleasant, reminiscent of the Rotunda of the American Museum of Natural History, both in terms of its color scheme – warm beige marble columns, scalloped and rectangular wave-like trim across the top of the Hall, with gilded highlights throughout. The hall speaks of grandness, but in the language of the gilded age, which would be appropriate for the relative youthfulness of the college, which was founded in 1800; Cambridge was founded c. 1209, Peterhouse in 1284.

I got lost within Downing’s gianormous campus. As a result, I was late and the first course was already being served by the time I entered Formal Hall. There was a fair representation of witches, devils, crazies (in straight jackets or Hannibal Lector-esque attire) and a fair number of people in US Air Force pilot outfits (apparently, it’s “awesome” to dress up like Americans, says one of the Brits wearing these outfits) in Hall. Petreans were definitely the best-dressed group – we had a few witches, and our MCR president had an orange cone for his hat. But for the most part, including myself, it looked as if Petreans decided to be Wall Streeters for this Formal Hall – we mostly wore suits and button-down shirts.

Dinner was strange. The first course was a mildly spicy tomato soup with an herbed scone. The latter was more interesting, both in terms of flavour and texture, than the former. The main course was a steak, topped with fried whitebait; the fish were better than the steak, which was medium-well, but too tough to be enjoyable. The sauce for the main course was a green, reminiscent of Slimer’s ectoplasm form the Ghost Busters. When the sauce was brought to our table, we had to ask the server what it was, and whether the right sauce was provided for our meal: no one would expect a turbid green sauce for their steaks, at least not outside of Downing. The server, himself, did not know what it was. He had to run to the kitchen to find out what it is – a garlic-parsley gravy, which tasted neither of garlic or parsley; more like a mildly wet, and insipid gravy that not only did not have any character outside of its ectoplasmic green-ness, but did not add anything, not even a noticeable difference in the moisture in my steak. Desert was the best course, though certainly not as good as what I would expect: pumpkin pie; though we had pumpkin tarts, a la mode, this evening. Turns out, pumpkin pie is the traditional Halloween dish. Downing’s was too eggy: I wanted a lighter, smoother, more pumpkiny tart.

Then came the after-the-dinner port, which was tightly rationed by a member of the Downing MCR. Petreans have no inhibitions about finishing port. At Downing, getting a second serving warrants a verbal reprimand. When I asked for another glass, a member of the Downing MCR unjokingly said “You know, I really shouldn’t be doing this.” I gave a cheeky smile, which communicated enough to get me the second glass anyway. With these sensibilities, one can only begin to imagine why, amongst other reasons, the Downing High Table was conspicuously empty, though Hall was packed to the gills.

                                topped with green ectoplasm sauce....

All things considered, the point of Formal Hall is not entirely about eating well. If one makes the mistake of thinking that it is purely a gustatory function, one misses the fact that Formal Hall is about enjoying oneself amongst fellow Cantabrigians and guests. Moreover, I also have the goal to go to every Cambridge college’s Formal Hall before I graduate. Hence, going to Downing was not disappointing. However, the point of this being a Formal Hall Swap was lost: the Downing MCR largely kept to themselves, and did not even bother to talk to or sit with the Peterhouse MCR. Apparently, their understanding is that an MCR swap is merely a change of setting for their guests from the other colleges – not an opportunity to chat with other Cantabrigians. Fortunately, there are 29 other Formal Halls to go to. So, stay tuned for more: the Formal Hall swap with Christ College is next.